Category Archives: MySpace Music

Reviews of unsigned (and small indie label) “MySpace Bands” based entirely on the songs on the bands (or solo artists) MySpace page.

kui! kui! On MYSPACE

This is some pretty incredible music by an experimental Japanese outfit. They got mad Trip-Hop minimalism going on and bizarre freestyle vocalizations. The beats and other sampled pieces of instrumentation are all rather stark in approach, the musical presentation almost hypnotic at times.

I find myself very much addicted to the sounds of kui! kui! The nonchalant “rapping” is truly appealing somehow. It is music without bounds, rootless in the traditional sense but then rooted in something quite bizarre. I also find it difficult to decipher if this is a fully realized band of some sort, or just a single artist goofing around with electronic-based instrumentation and vocal effects.

In any event, this is an incredibly refreshing and new sound to my pink and sexy ears. It is like some kind of electronic religious sermon from space! I ask you kindly to grab a listen to kui! kui! And let me know if your life is changed after being indoctrinated…

Your Sister’s Canary

Your Sister’s Canary is a band from Bergen, New Jersey and they play Blues/Pop/Jazz music, at least that’s what it says on their MySpace page.

So how come I’m reviewing this band? Unlike some of the really horrid MySpace bands we’ve reviewed on this site before (Hollywood Undead) this one wasn’t found at the top of the most played artists charts, instead there was an EMail tip sent in to check out Your Sister’s Canary. And occasionally these EMails are actually read and acted upon, this is one of those occasions! (Send your Email to

They’ve currently got four songs available for streaming play: “Bread,” “Miss Bona Fide,” “Lydia Albright,” and “(Fish and) Ships.” Continue reading “Your Sister’s Canary” »

Alice Kim Jenkins has done it again!

The new piece by Alice Kim Jenkins is aluminous and effervescent and just plain old calming. She figures in greatly and wildly, strange figures from outer-space. I enjoy her trifles and her other-worldly glue-gun apparatus of goodness. There are pleasant pauses in this piano-based instrumental composition from heaven. One does indeed wonder if Alice Kim herself is from that great land in the sky. Could these sounds heard be made from anyone else other than an angel? The likelihood certainly points to sour and genuinely delightful goose beats from beyond the third moon, now and forever.

Alice Kim creates what the church elders once successfully referred to as “substantial extenders”, in that her piano heroics are both tender and forceful, never showboating but forever bold with a genuine mellow and an utterly delicious chocolate covered candy shell. I wish more were like her, but there is only one, just one. Far be it from me to read into ones personal life, but this pleasant little tune almost reads like a diary entry. I can taste the tear drops and smell the warm cups of coffee; hold snow in my fist and yell at it. Yell until it is no longer snow, but something more beautiful, something more substantial like this piece of music entitled “El sueno de don Quijote”. For what reason it is given this name, I do not know, perhaps one should ask the artist? Yes. Perhaps…in time, one shall.

Fluttery gallons of love, pleasant dips in a pool filled with bubbly and fizzing soda pops. I can’t even think anymore, and I don’t even want to, I am won over by the music. Won over by this fantastic piece of instrumental gold that I won’t soon forget; and even the late great Mr. Rogers himself would indeed have to champion the complexities by which this pianist attacks her instrument. I am beyond offended, I am simply a shaved werewolf who has found melodies that express my soul’s inner-most, and never before…or perhaps ever again…will I feel so warm inside. Thank you Miss Alice Kim, thank you so very much.

My Critique of Your Sound Thus Far (An Open Letter to Alice Kim Jenkins)

Dear Alice Kim,

I greatly enjoy “A Walk in the Park” and could listen to this song quite often. It almost reminds me of something that would have appeared in one of those Jill Clayburgh films of the 1970’s, such as “An Unmarried Woman”. There is something slightly melancholy about “A Walk in the Park”, a sort of longing maybe? I also get this sense of hope and slight optimism of potentially good things to come to fruition…in any event, you have created a delightful little primary melody on this particular song. The middle section is rather pleasant and dreamy as well.

The general mood of “Blind Ambition” is that of a foggy atmosphere. Perhaps this song is warning against the dangers of having an egotistical personality type? I greatly enjoy the repetitive minimalism in relation to lyrical content, since you continually repeat the song’s title. There is almost a hypnotic quality in doing this, and I find it to be highly effective. Are you in fact singing on this particular song? Ultimately, while “Blind Ambition” takes an icy somber tone, I also find myself enjoying a slight romantic whimsy in relation to your piano playing.

“Silent Snowflakes” is my personal favorite, and in some respects it strikes me as your most universal song that I have yet heard. There is a delicacy to your approach, or technique, if you like. Again, I am reminded of something that could easily appear on a movie soundtrack. By listening, I gather a mixture of moods; a blend of the bittersweet but also a lesson learned. A song for survivors; this might be one way of interpreting it from an emotional standpoint. There is certainly passion in the style of play, as emotion rises to the surface and then falls back into place again. A standout instrumental composition and highly recommended; I certainly hope to hear more songs of this variety from you in the future.



Ps. All interested parties please visit the following:

Alice Kim Jenkins

Crystal Castles

Ah yes, a MySpace Music feature. We haven’t had one of these in awhile. Tonight I’m listening to a group called Crystal Castles which I found ranked #10 among the unsigned “top artist” listings.

Listening to “Crimewave,” I’m not sure what I think. It’s not really what I expected from Thrash/Thrash/Thrash as their genre. This is definitely very 80s influenced stuff in a way but there’s also an influence from the more psychedelic electronic music of the 1990s. And I think there’s some other influences there that I’m not quite sure about.

“Courtship Dating” is an interesting track. In a way it’s what I was expecting from the second track (the repetitive, kind of unimaginative drums & bass) but in another way it’s nothing like I expected. It’s catchy and tripped out at the same time. When the electronic elements dropped out and it’s just the heavily reverbed vocals and guitar that’s where the song really takes off for me. I actually thought that was another song (and for all it seems to have with what came before it might as well be.) This is really spaced out beautiful stuff. I have to say I’m used used to hearing absolute crap on MySpace (see Hollywood Undead) that I was anticipating more crap but this band is pretty interesting so far (if not totally “my thing.”)

“Untrust Us” kind of kills the momentum of the last track for me. This one sounds a bit too “by the numbers” for me. Yes there’s some cool ideas here and I like the vocal effect although I’m worried it will wear thin if they use it as often on all of their songs as I’ve heard it so far.

“Alice Practice” this reminds me of Atari Teenage Riot. Definitely a left turn from the last track. I’m impressed by the variety of stuff they are doing. OK, I think this song is winning me over. The instrumental breaks are pretty damn bad ass actually. And her vocals really work in this style. So far I’ve actually been really impressed by 1 and a half of the four songs I’ve heard (the second half of “Courtship Dating” and all of this song, “Alice Practice.”

“Magic Spells” sounds inspired by Grandmaster Flash & Boards of Canada. OK, mostly Boards of Canada. And I think it’s pretty good but it doesn’t have quite the same mastery as Boards of Canada’s music does. That being said, it’s pretty good and I am impressed at once again being surprised by what the next track is bringing. At this point I don’t know what to expect from the last track, “Air War,” and that’s a pretty cool thing to pull off. With most bands (especially the cookie cutter bands that tend to make it to the top of the charts) it’s pretty easy to know what their next track is going to sound like after hearing the first 5. Not with this one.

“Air War” reminds me a bit of M.I.A. here on the intro. This stuff is actually pretty weird, I’m surprised it’s as popular as it is. Are the kids really this weird these days? God, I hope so. Kids do I have some magic dolphins for you. Stored right in your lunch boxes. Fish ‘N’ Chips.

Overall I give a thumbs up to Crystal Castles. I may even listen to this music again. Rarely can I say that about a band I find on MySpace.

MYSPACE Band Review: The Blast Furnace


This is the sort of band that causes one to take pause and to reevaluate one’s life, and quite sincerely so at that. It would appear that this is the sound persons in the city of Detroit choose to make or simply must make, and all this despite the fact that my period is late. I tend to think of bands of this variety while soaking in the bath or shaking my soggy bum down at the discothèque. The song that this duo is currently featuring is a little gem entitled “Listen To Gwar”, and certainly, this is good advice. The track clocks in at a whopping forty-seven seconds, albeit, a life changing forty-seven seconds. The song boasts of a drum machine beat to be reckoned with and Riff Rock to rival Pearl Jam or Glen Campbell on their very best of days; and on top of it all are such amazing vocal harmonies that one immediately begs to make comparisons with The Beach Boys…or perhaps The Turtles.

I would certainly like to give this band points for originality, and indeed I will. The lyrics are sung with authority and it is as if I am transformed into some sort of alternate musical universe of truly great proportions. A comparison to Simon & Garfunkel certainly seems feasible. Make no mistake, this is political music, and these are harsh times. War in Vietnam, bad economy and loads of Liberty Cabbage for one and all…

If you got the blues then I do believe that The Blast Furnace will deliver the ear candy that you so desperately crave. Who knows what they will come up with next, but I wait with mildly-retarded breath and a bonnet to march. On a personal note, my only issue with this group of Rockin’ Rockers is their involvement with the religious practice based upon Frank Herbert’s epic SCI-FI novel “Dune”, but other than that…I am witnessing music perfection. I am just so happy, and I know you will be as well. They have some highly entertaining text on their MYSPACE advert; so have yourself a look:

Lies UnKnown

First I’ll post the spam that these guys left on a recent entry:

Real True Band “Lies unKnown”

Forget about tuning in to another band that sounds like the last ten you’ve just heard. “Lies unKnown” is a real true to life Detroit Rock & Roll Band. Originating from the surrounding suburbs, they have united together to bring you some of the best music the Motor City has to offer. Through their live performance at nightclubs, concert theaters and all age events, “Lies unKnown” is gaining recognition while connecting with an audience of all genres. The album tracks are available for download on iTunes, Napster, Rhapsody, emusic, LALA and other digital platforms. The full length album can be purchased from the following websites: and

Home is definitely center stage for the front man, singer/songwriter/guitarist “Justin Alexander”. As the driving force behind the band, he pours out his soul in each song of his performance. His ability to capture and address the attention of the listener is reminiscent of many legendary artists of the past. He was born in the city of Detroit on August 16, 1988. His parents were performing musicians, so, Justin started cutting his teeth on Rock & Roll from day one. But, by the age of five his parents separated, Justin’s heartaches, hard times and life experiences would become his writing template.

Heartache seems to run like water in the streets and the pain expressed in his songs are of a broken home and an attempt to recapture what was lost. “Justin’s” lyrics tell of a path that one has to live to be able to write about.

Bassist “Sara Cole” is probably one of the hottest things that you will ever see with four strings and a skirt! But don’t get fooled by the visual appeal, “Sara” is half of the rock solid driving foundation for “Lies unKnown”. Passion, Emotion and Precision (PEP) are the only words that define “Sara’”, she is prepared and ready for what ever the moment brings, and she definitely delivers the element of surprise to her audience. As a lead guitarist “Jamie Allen” sets the stage with action, enthusiasm and fire. His approach on stage becomes contagious for anyone watching him perform. “Jamie’s” chops are a compliment to the music of “Lies unKnown”. Flavorsome melodic guitar riffs and superb backing vocals are the principal rudiments to any great live act. These undeniable qualities bring his performances to a new echelon.

“Joe (Joe Pizzazz) Piazza” drummer for “Lies unKnown” has the potential to steal every girl’s heart. Lighting up a stage seems to be effortless as he displays his charismatic persona that magically lures ones imagination. But, the business of performing live differentiates him from any other; he is all about giving an instinctive hard hitting performance. And, the fans have the satisfaction of experiencing the magic, when he hits it.

Continue reading “Lies UnKnown” »

Mindless Self Indulgence

I’ve been looking for a band to challenge Hollywood Undead for the title of “Worst Music Ever” and just about 15 seconds into the first song on Mindless Self Indulgence’s MySpace page “Never Wanted To Dance” I think I may have a true challenger. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not ready to hand the crown of “worst ever” over to them just as Hollywood Undead is monumentally horrible but this is some pretty horrendous music.

“Never Wanted To Dance” – Sounds like about 10 (awful) songs all playing at once. Don’t get me wrong, that can be a good thing (if the songs aren’t awful) but this is just absolutely stupid. Much like Hollywood Undead, it sounds like some combination of every bad trend in music over the past 30 years or so. I hear some Marilyn Manson in here along with some pop-punk, and some rap-rock-metal. It’s all here.

“Lights Out” – Oh and cheesy strings. They’ve got amazingly cheesy strings and cheezy techno music and cheezy sound effects. They’ve truly got it all. Again like with Hollywood Undead I’m reminded of boy bands. It sounds like if the Backstreet Boys were a rap-metal band.

Alright, I think you get the idea.

So how did I come across this awful band? I found them while looking at the top artist charts at looking for a band to review of course. They are ranked #1 on’s top artist charts for unsigned bands. At this point I pretty much assume any of the high rated “artists” are going to suck ass. Which makes sense when you think about MySpace being so teenager heavy (and teenagers having generally awful taste in music of course.) Not that it still isn’t sad. 26 million plays (lifetime thus far) for these clowns while so many good artists and bands on MySpace go largely unnoticed.

Here’s a picture of the guys (and gals, apparently) by the way:

Mindless Self Indulgence Band Picture

So is this all some sort of tongue in cheek joke like I assume Hollywood Undead must be? Possibly. But even if it is, I don’t find it all that funny.

The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus

The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus are quite popular on MySpace, they have over 47 million plays thus far and they are currently ranked #4 among unsigned bands. In the past I’ve found that most of the most popular groups on MySpace tend to suck ass as MySpace is filled with kids who don’t know anything about music and of course tend to listen to crap. Will these guys be any different? Unlikely considering that among their chosen genres are screamo and pop punk.

So let’s take a listen to the songs on their MySpace page.

“Damn Regret” – The first thing I notice is the professional sounding recording. Unsigned sure, but I don’t get the feeling that these guys are very DIY. They have someone who knows what they are doing recording their music, now this can be a good thing or a bad thing, in this case it’s a bad thing. Because it just makes them sound just like every other forgettable brand, er, I mean band in this genre of pop music masquerading as rock. The song is all bombastic drums (enough fills there?) and generic guitars with the usual teenage angst vocals. Admittedly it is a pretty catchy tune, I can see why the kids like ‘em. But there’s nothing here for people who are really into music.

“Disconnected” – Alright, copy/paste the comments from above.

“Your Guardian Angel” – The requisite acoustic ballad. Right? No this isn’t predictable (sarcasm alert.) Keyboard strings help to take the cheese to the next level. Very forgettable tune on the verse. Requisite heavy guitar part. Seriously, could this music be anymore by the numbers? It’s like they have a coloring book and they are neatly coloring within the lines. There’s nothing interesting here musically and the tune isn’t memorable enough to make up for that. And it’s doesn’t work emotionally as it’s so plastic. It barely feels likes anything at all.

“Face Down” – This sounds exactly like every other song in the pop punk genre. There’s been about 100 million songs over the last 10 years that sound just like this. It feels like pop music is in a standstill when you hear stuff like this.


These guys don’t seem to have any interest in doing anything even remotely original. It’s clear that this is music made to be popular among the clueless masses. You know, tunes to get chicks, nothing else. There’s nothing to listen to for anyone who actually likes music.

In the photo of The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus I’ve included below you can see they have a couple of pretty boys upfront. I’m sure most of their female fans (and I would assume their fanbase is 95% female) mostly likes them because they think these two dudes are cute. And they are, I’ll give ‘em that. Good lookin’ lads.

The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus

The Strange Loop

The Strange Loop is the other side of the MySpace music equation. We’ve written some scathing reviews of some of the most popular MySpace “artists” such as Hollywood Undead (who are truly awful) but then there’s cool quirky original music like The Strange Loop, who prior to MySpace (and the internet in general) would probably have had a hard time getting heard by anyone. While they haven’t exactly hit the big time just yet (they have a total of 657 plays thus far) I do think that it’s a great thing that music like this can be made and heard without any commercial BS getting in the way.

They list The Unicorns, The Islands, David Bowie, Belle & Sebastian, Neil Young, Beck, & Neutral Milk Hotel as their influences. I don’t really hear the emotional nakedness of Neutral Milk Hotel or the experimentation of David Bowie here. Of the artists they list as their influences, I mostly hear Belle & Sebastian. Unfortunately for The Strange Loop, Belle & Sebastian aren’t among my favorite bands and I don’t think The Strange Loop will be making their way into my regular listening routine but I will certainly post a retraction of this statement if they do.

Yes, while I do like the music here it’s a bit too twee and laid back to really grab me. That being said, I do think it’s quality stuff that you should check out if Belle & Sebastian (and similar groups) are among your favorites.

For some reason the lofi track “Build Itself” (which sounds like it was recorded on a four track) is probably my favorite song on their MySpace page. It seems to have a bit more energy and weirdness to it than their other tracks and weirdness tends to be a positive for me. “Iowa” is probably their most polished sounding tune. It sounds like the type of tune you’d hear on an indie movie soundtrack. The singer’s voice reminds me a lot of Kevin Barnes from Of Montreal in this song.