I Hate Animal Collective More Than Anything
By Mozart Breath on Dec 19, 2009 in Features
Skinny white asexual dorks with safe Indie Rock haircuts ideal for the Pitchfork generation. These young boys are not capable of making music, but rather, pointless noise to play to their equally repulsive trust-fund Hipster girlfriends.
Some members of Animal Collective attended college and experimented with drugs, or perhaps all members of the band went this highly original route? When Panda Bear gets horny he simply ejaculates into the collective mouths of his incipit fans.
Why would anyone listen to Animal Collective? Oh; did I forget to mention that they have a new EP entitled “Fall Be Kind”. What the hell is that even supposed to mean? These criminally retarded wads of ass better get their fucking heads on straight or I will take a giant shit on them!
Oh! My favorite member of Animal Collective is Geologist! He’s the cute one, yeah, pretty like a fucking massive stroke and a fistful of hemorrhoids. I blame Pitchfork media; I blame the collective (animal?) supposed generational business deal that has gone down with each respective party involved. Because it needs to be said that Animal Collective is not a band, but rather, a twisted corporation selling poisonous dreams and calling it music.
This band is like The Arcade Fire for America’s working class. Their studio experimentation on their incomprehensible albums speaks to the devil in every individual. Avoid this band and find true faith in a band called The Cure.
Geologist, Animal Collective, Panda Bear, Fall Be KindBecome A MusicByDay.com Music Blogger.
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Any questions???
FORGIVE ME, PLEASE. I AM SORRY.
Mozart Breath | Dec 19, 2009 | Reply
Okay, I can deffinately unerstand not being able to immediatley find the appeal to animal collaective but for me it was certainly an aquired taste and well worth the effort. once your ears adjut to what initally sounds like banter the fog clears and youll see the greatest vision in music right now. Marijuana? it may help as a shortcut. and fall be kind is a play on words they do it here and there like “for revredn green”. Fall behind=fall be kind is the time adjustment thing
AC fan | Dec 19, 2009 | Reply
I have mixed feelings about Animal Collective - for a while I just didn’t get the hype and I thought their stuff was almost unlistenable on some levels (their vocals I found to be particularly irritating) but I must admit they’ve grown on me and I do enjoy their most recent stuff particularly.
Marvin Marks | Dec 19, 2009 | Reply
I’d rather listen to The Doors or Bob Dylan. Sometimes being an old fart is the most awesome destination in town. Animal Collective has too much of an instant mythology to them; they are almost like some kind of bogus new age religious movement. Meaning that: the enjoyment of Animal Collective certainly requires a leap of faith.
Sincerely yours,
Mozart Breath
I AM SORRY.
Mozart Breath | Dec 19, 2009 | Reply
hey. they actually produce music while you sit around on the computer and spend your life writing about how people suck. well you know what? you suck. fuck off dipshit
Ani Malco | Dec 19, 2009 | Reply
So don’t buy their album. Simple as that. No need to typecast large groups of people
Unless that’s what you were after in the first place
Dizzle | Dec 19, 2009 | Reply
typical, inevitable, boring backlash. yawn. you’re so cool.
showstopper | Dec 20, 2009 | Reply
Mozart Breath | Dec 20, 2009 | Reply
I’m sorry if I may have hurt anyone with this topic that I created. I am sorry.
Mozart Breath | Dec 20, 2009 | Reply
I like em
Rhetoric | Dec 20, 2009 | Reply
cool story, bro
Bro | Jan 11, 2010 | Reply
They really are horrible, but so is your poorly written article.
E | Jan 26, 2010 | Reply
“E” i completely agree with you - what exactly are you trying to say in your argument?
i would take into account what you were saying if you had actually come up with any kind of ‘point’ of value or used any kind of evidence to support your ideas. and besides, you don’t even focus on the music (you’re on a music blog, it’s always a good idea) - so actually talk about the music instead of throwing random insults around about the band members and clearly demonstrating your complete ignorance to what you’re talking about.
steph | Feb 20, 2010 | Reply
Wow, you must REALLY hate hipsters. Now I’m no hipster, but I LOVE Animal Collective. I can actually hear music in their “mindless” collection of noises, but it seems like you cannot. It’s not too surprising, seeing how you seem to cling to older music. Don’t get me wrong, I love classic rock, but if you can’t be open-minded about music and avoid immediately connecting it with a kind of person (hipster), then you can’t enjoy this group.
... | Feb 27, 2010 | Reply